Inner Vs External Drive

Are You a Pigeon or a Raven?

Inner Vs External Drive: Often, we hear others, or ourselves, say: “I’m in search of myself,” or “I’m searching for my purpose.” It is quite normal to pass through this stage in life where individuals ponder their existence, purpose, and goals in life profoundly. Nobody, the writer of these words included, really expects a spontaneous and quick answer to such an existential question. It needs to be weighed and thoroughly thought through to find the closest answer – which is more of a revelation than a mere answer.

However, there are two main kinds of drivers and motivators for this answer. The first is that which is driven by our inner being, reflecting our connection to our values, skills, interests, and motivations. The second is driven from outside of us; this is where we are influenced by others’ opinions or believe that imitating someone else would, by default, bring us the same results it’s bringing them, while at the same time it would fulfill us.

In both cases, we can accomplish things and bring some kind of prosperity to our lives. However, in the case of inner motivation and propulsion, it is more likely to achieve more sustainable, solid, and growable achievements and self-fulfillment than the latter. Even though both processes can put you on the path, one ensures that this path is yours to own and self-sustain, while the other can easily be given up upon and lacks the inherent ability of self-sustainability and growth.

In this article, I aim to show why a “forced” or “imitated” process in our quest for self-fulfillment is likely to blow back in our faces, while the inner-motivated self-fulfillment is contained and its combustion serves as a propulsion motivator rather than an outburst causing instigation.

I don’t know if all are familiar with the following fable, which might be part of Aesop’s Fables or other similar folklore traditions from various cultures. The essence of the story revolves around a raven who admires a pigeon’s graceful walk and attempts to imitate it. In his efforts to replicate the pigeon’s elegant steps, the raven becomes so consumed with mimicking another’s style that he forgets his own way of walking. As a result, the raven ends up walking neither like a pigeon nor as he naturally would, embodying a clumsy gait that he cannot correct.

The moral of this story serves me well in explaining my point. In my book “On The Path to Wealth” (which is due for publishing in a couple of months), I talk at length about the importance of inner drive rather than external forces in shaping our lives, goals, and self-fulfillment.

The Quest Of Self-Fulfillment:

The quest for self-fulfillment is a valid and much-needed journey on our path to live a life that is both fulfilling and prosperous. It is a quest that needs to have a goal, and it cannot be a goal by itself, meaning that one must not wallow in this journey more than it should and understand that the negative side effects of this state can be disastrous to our evolution and growth. It can lead us to procrastination, taking us to the opposite results of the originally intended intention. It is also an ongoing quest that evolves with time and sharpens with action. Sitting and contemplating our purpose taking meaningful steps forward would ensure our stagnation and discourage our action. It serves our fears and indulges our comfort zone. The only way to make this quest fruitful and effective is to combine it with action, learning, and evaluating with each step how it aligns with us and what course adjustment is needed. The “action” is the act of putting insight to the test, evaluating its shortcomings, and identifying the next step in our quest. I linger on this point since it has a lot to do with the sources of our revelation and what supports it.

“A real process, goal, or ambition cannot be generated from the outside world and cannot ignore the programming of our beings. If you set a goal to be a successful football player because you see that those players are famous, have money, etc., and you want to imitate them, but you don’t like sports activities by nature, then your goal will never be achieved since it doesn’t resonate with who you are. Unfortunately, a lot of people attempt to follow a goal or carry out a plan that is based on an outside influence and not from an inside drive. This here is the main bedrock reason for their giving up and failing, and for the difference between those who succeed and excel and those who fail” – On The Path to Wealth.

Each one of us has their own values, and when I talk about values, I’m not referring to the moral sort of beliefs. I am talking about the things that we truly hold at a high level of importance in our lives and that we are willing to invest in them the ultimate resources we all have: Time, Money, and Energy. It is proven that most of these resources are exhausted in a hierarchical way from up – down. Meaning that the most ranked values we have will enjoy the most amount of these resources, and the one after will have less, and so on. It is also proven that most people exhaust their resources in the first top five values they hold important in their lives. After that, whatever value or task is coming, it is easily given up upon and not given any resources since basically, we don’t have what to give anymore. To those downgraded values – attention can be given just if we were to achieve them or have them with no effort, or the need to experience pain in achieving them. Basically, we are not willing to endure pain in achieving them, but we would like to have their benefits with no effort at all. (Based on the theory of the “hierarchy of values” by Dr. John Demartini).

For example, if a person wants to lose weight and actively takes action towards their goal by enrolling in a diet program and joining a gym, but their values and allocation hierarchy of resources do not align with this new goal, he will likely quit after two weeks. The process will cause him discomfort he’s not prepared for. He seeks to lose weight without the pain and without having to prioritize this new goal over their other high-level values. That’s why, by the way, we find today that the industry of pills for losing weight is flourishing. People don’t want to have the pain in the process or to allocate Time and Energy for it. They think taking a pill will deliver them the benefit they desire, with no extra pain.

The opposite example would be a person who sets a goal to have a successful business and to be rich. If this goal resonates with their own values and paradigm, this person will invest every waking minute and ounce of energy in their business. Their mind will be receptive to new ideas and opportunities that can help their business, and most importantly, he is willing and ready to take the pain of failure and work hard since for him, this is part of the package. Not just the collecting of profits but also the prices he has to pay on their way there.

Inner Vs. External Drive:

So, what makes the inner drive such a forceful factor, and is it that important?

It all aligns with the points I laid down earlier. It’s about the values, beliefs, and paradigms. When a person starts a process of any kind, let alone in the personal growth or occupation domains, the importance of mental resilience along with the will to endure the “pain” associated with the process is often the ultimate factor for success or failure. When we align our activities and endeavors with what resonates with us, we have profound insights into the roadmap of our journey. When we find the true “Why” for us and we can answer it, then it is much easier to build confidence during the process of execution.

I will refrain from going too much into the process of finding the “Why” and the manifestation of it. But I will lay down a brief guide for you to find your path.

First, the “Why”. There is a magical trait to the question “Why.” If you practice a simple exercise in which you ask a question, for example, “What do I want from life?” And then, each answer you come up with, you challenge again and again with the question “Why”, you will probably arrive to source, the core and the right answer. So, if you want to be famous, for example, ask “why,” if the answer let’s say- “I want to be rich,” then ask “Why” and so on, the chain of the answers and their “Why’s” challenge will eventually bring you the realization of the root of your desires and it will, most definitely, shed light on your values and paradigm. There is a big difference between an answer for the “Why” that is “to be able to take care of my family in a respected way”, for example, and “to show others that I’m better than them” or “to seek validation” – if the latter is your drivers, then, you better go back to the drawing table and address your paradigm issues such as self-confidence and believing in yourself and your strength.

After the “Why,” you will need to manifest your revelation. You need to find the “What” and “How”– with which you can assist yourself with Aristotle’s four questions,check out my article on this, and then devise a plan of action on how to achieve what you want.

As for the last question, the “When”– well, that is very easy; the “When” is always here and now, the present moment. Not the future nor the past as they both don’t exist (“On The Path to Wealth”).

So, imagine now that all these dynamics that are associated with a process are underestimated; what would this mean to the viability and sustainability of the process? It will surely collapse. This is exactly what an external-driven process would do- underestimate these dynamics. Since, basically, we either work on someone else’s beliefs and values or we are influenced by appearances and glamour without fully understanding the prices.

On the other hand, an inner-driven force would bring the opposite side effects; we are committed, we understand the “Why” and we agree with it, and we are aware of the plan and its costs.

We are not built to live up to the expectations of others, each one of us is unique, rare, and one-of-a-kind. We only should live up to our expectations of ourselves. What you expect from yourself is what gives the strengths and fuel and you should find what that expectation is and why. External validation quests show weak character and insecurity. It should never be a goal by itself since once it is achieved or appears to be achieved, the drive will wither and die. A reason that is concluded in “everybody is doing this” or “it works for them” is not a reason, at best, it’s an envy disguised in an illusion of direction that soon enough will be proven as a senseless pursuit.

Expanding vs. Contracting:

Think of it like this:

A bubble of air that is subjected to external pressures will contract and shrink. The inner pressure that fills every one of us and is the matter that constructs us, would be crushed under the external pressure to the point that the shape of the bubble starts to get smaller and smaller, its surface would be deformed, and its size will occupy less and less place in its space. Also, the compression of the matter inside would arrive at the point of implosion since the size of the form is starting to be far smaller than the volume of the matter. This example describes a person whose matter is one thing while the external environment is imposing a force that promotes a different matter than their internal. This person will shrink and wither and at a point, they will implode, leaving unrepairable damage. In this process, this person will occupy less space in the abstract environment around them, detaching from real influence on others and losing the ability to affect and contribute to their environment.

On the other hand, if the same bubble would be inflated from the inside, meaning that its drive is coming from inside-out, this would mean that the matter that occupies the bubble space is the same as its origins and aligns with its properties, in this case (assuming the bubble has no way to explode), the bubble will grow bigger and occupy more space in its abstract surrounding, touching other bubbles and interacting with other energy fields – which can bring along limitless opportunities for growth and combinations. This is the situation with the person that is driven from inside and aligns their actions with their matter. They will expand, grow, interact, and force new opportunities in their reality as their space is expanding and growing.

The Combined Model:

Now, let me be clear. I am not against inspiration, far from it. In fact, those expanding bubbles serve as an inspiration for others, encouraging others to take the leap of faith and showing others that life is limitless.

However, there is a big difference between imitating someone and drawing inspiration from them. Imitation will always be the version that lacks the innovation, creativity, and vision of the original. On the other hand, inspiration is having a revelation of a different angle of observation, drawing encouragement and confidence for a better direction of our “brand”, of our matter, values, and the ability to contribute.

Let’s say you are an employee who is not very content with your life. Your colleague decided to leave the same job and pursue entrepreneurship in the food domain. You see that his restaurant is successful and that he is making money and is content with his new life. This gives you the idea of doing the same and opening a restaurant since the money is good, but you fail to acknowledge that you are not fit for the food business, you hate kitchens, and you dislike the face-to-face service with customers. If you go ahead and open that restaurant, you will soon realize that you are much worse than before. You are struggling to sustain something that doesn’t resonate with your values, and you are doing work that does not fulfill you. It’s needless to say that the future of your restaurant is doomed to failure and the happiness and fulfillment you sought are drifting further away from you. Instead of expanding you are contracting, instead of fulfillment, you feel emptiness.

However, if you draw the essence and the message from your colleague’s action – which is to be independent and seek entrepreneurship, you know how to connect to your inner drives and passions, you do your research on who you are and what your values are and you feel driven by passion rather than escape, then you will find the niche that is right for you and in which you will find success and fulfillment that matches your colleague’s, bringing your own contribution to the fabric of your abstract surroundings.

Steps Towards Achieving Self-Fulfillment and Enhancing Inner Drive:

After understanding the importance of aligning our pursuits with our inner values and motivations, the question arises: How do we practically achieve this state of self-fulfillment and cultivate a strong inner drive? Here are actionable steps to guide you on this journey:

1. Self-Reflection: Begin with introspection to understand your true values, passions, and what genuinely motivates you. Use journaling, meditation, or conversational reflections as tools to uncover these insights.
2. Set Personal Goals: Based on your reflections, set clear, achievable goals that resonate with your inner values. Ensure these goals are specific, measurable, attainable, relevant, and time-bound.
3. Action Planning: For each goal, devise a step-by-step action plan. This plan should outline what you need to do, the resources required, and milestones to gauge progress.
4. Seek Inspiration, Not Imitation: Identify individuals who embody the qualities you admire and aspire towards. Draw inspiration from their journey to forge your unique path, avoiding the pitfalls of mere imitation.
5. Embrace Learning and Growth: Pursue opportunities for learning and growth that align with your goals. This could involve taking courses, attending workshops, or seeking mentorship in areas that interest you.
6. Practice Mindfulness: Cultivate mindfulness to stay present and focused on your journey. This practice can help you maintain clarity of purpose and resilience in the face of challenges.
7. Regular Review and Adaptation: Periodically review your goals and progress – assessment. Be open to adapting your plans based on new insights or changes in your circumstances, ensuring they remain aligned with your core values.
8. Celebrate Progress: Acknowledge and celebrate your achievements, no matter how small. This recognition reinforces your motivation and commitment to your personal growth journey.

By integrating these steps into your life, you move closer to a state of self-fulfillment driven by an authentic inner drive. This process is not a one-time effort but a continuous journey of self-discovery, learning, and growth. Remember, the essence of achieving true self-fulfillment lies in embracing your uniqueness and aligning your actions with your inner values and motivations.

As you journey on this path, reflect on whether you’re adopting the role of the pigeon or the raven. Let your journey be guided by self-awareness and an open heart towards inspiration, paving the way for a fulfilling and prosperous life that is uniquely yours.

So, are you a Pigeon or a Raven? 

Would you try to imitate others without understanding your matter and in the process lose the essence of who you are, or would you embrace your uniqueness and strive to achieve the best version of it, while opened for inspiration and self-awareness?

The answer is a choice; it is not an imposed one. We are the ones entrusted with the utilization of our power of choice (I talk about this at length in my upcoming book “Primal Alchemy”), it is up to us to expand or contract. It’s about our resilience to face our fears and doubts, it’s our faith in the divine as much as in ourselves, it’s about our thoughts and mindfulness, and it’s all about being true to ourselves.

SLAM helps leaders uncover and ignite their inner drive, fostering transformation. By aligning with the Primal Circle, it enhances influence and empowers meaningful, productive action.

Discover my book, On The Path To Wealth, and start your journey to success.

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